Wednesday, 15 June 2016

Saying Yes

Have you ever jumped into something without any hesitation and instantly knew you made the right decision? Well, I did that a year ago and today I'm here celebrating my one year anniversary with my girlfriend, Deanna.

History
Deanna and I have known each other a long time.  See, our moms are high school best friends, so naturally the children would become friends. We would see her family on a regular basis; until they moved to Edmonton back in the late 90's. Because Deanna and I were young, I wasn't even 10, and she was under 5. So needless to say, becoming pen pal buddies wasn't exactly on our top priority.

May 2015
So, let's skip forward a bunch of years and see where Deanna and I are at.

Me

  • Just finished my first year of college
  • Finally recovered from my pneumonia I got back in March
  • Feeling depressed due to how my Nan was doing and the setbacks that getting sick caused
Deanna
  • Working at Second cup
  • Reading an excessive amount of fan fiction
  • Fighting bouts of depression
So on a fateful day in May, I opened up facebook messenger, as everyone does on the daily and sends Deanna "hi". After that, we start talking daily and switch to texting because of it's easier. 

June 15, 2015
I was feeling defeated, the previous night I had finally asked out the guy I had liked. To find out he has a girlfriend. I was mad, all the signs were there, but he said no. So I had talked to Deanna, and all my other girlfriends wondering if I was crazy or not. But Deanna's reaction was different, in fact, she was fucking happy that he had said no. I don't know about you, but when someone crushes you, normally people support you. I had to get to the bottom of it, find out why she was happy. 

After some prodding, I found out she had feelings for me. At that time, my head was spinning, my stomach was in knots and I was in shock. Now, at that time, I had never really openly come out as bisexual, but it was something I always knew deep down. So, on June 15, 2015, Deanna asked if I would be her girlfriend. I had said yes. I didn't think or hesitate, I just blurted it out and just thought, "holy shit I'm doing this".

June 15, 2016
It's been a year to that fateful day and I'm so happy to say, we're still together. When I was in Edmonton for my Nan's funeral in October was the first time we had actually seen each other. It also confirmed the fact that I wasn't delusional and that the feelings were real. She came down for spring break, where we went on our first official date at a Marianas Trench concert. We shared our first kiss halfway through her visit. 

You're probably wondering why the kiss happened so late into our first time together. A few reasons; nervousness, I knew she'd want to be the first to do it and timing. Don't worry we stopped kissing during the trip to eat, sleep and other normal human functions.

I look back now and think how things would have been different had we stayed in contact with each other. I for one, most likely would have dated her brother. We would have been like sisters, but she still probably would have gained feelings for me. 

Final Reflection
Sometimes in life, you need to say yes without knowing why you're doing it. I love Deanna so much, she makes me feel worthy of myself, made me be open about who I am outside of my close friends, and more. So happy anniversary my love. I'm so proud to be your girlfriend.
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